How to Tell Your Guests No Children At Your Wedding

Oh this question. It may be one of the top debated topics among brides, mothers, in-laws, and venues. How do I tell my guests no children are invited to my wedding? Even though is a common practice for many weddings, some people are sensitive about it so tread lightly. Here are our top ideas to tell your guests your wedding is adult-only.

1. ENVELOPE ADDRESSING 

Your first line of defense is the envelope addressing. I recommend using both inner and outer envelopes. On the outer envelope, you would add the guest names and address. For example:Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Smith123 Main StreetDallas, Texas 75248 Then on the inner envelope, you would put their names only. Robert and Susanor Mr. and Mrs. Thomas SmithIf children were invited and you are using a single mailing envelope, you would add “and family”:Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Smithand family123 Main StreetDallas, Texas 75248If you were using two envelopes to mail per traditional etiquette, you would list the children’s names below the adult names on the inner envelope:Robert and SusanSally and Bobbyor Mr. and Mrs. Thomas SmithSally and Bobby(For more on inner and outer envelope addressing, I invite you to read all about it here.)

2. PHONE CALL 

Guest should know that whoever’s names are on the envelopes, those are the people who are invited to the wedding. Those guests who you are unsure they will understand this etiquette, you may call them. Traditional etiquette is that you should call your guests with children and politely tell them your wedding is adults-only.

3. WEBSITE 

You shouldn’t put any phrase on the invitation suite that says “adults-only”, “no children please”, etc. but feel free to add this to your website. You can simply state it to the point or a cute phrase. Here are some examples below."Please respect our wishes of an adult-only ceremony and reception.""We love children, but we respectfully request this is an adult-only event.""Feel free to hire a babysitter for the night and have a fun night out! This is an adult-only event.""Adults-only please""Due to the restrictions of our venue, children are not invited.""Kindly note that only children of immediate family are invited.""Please respect our wishes that this is an adult-only event; however, we have hired a babysitter for the evening for your convenience."It’s totally fine to have a flower girl or ring bearer for your ceremony. Kindly note that only children in the wedding party are invited.

4. RESPONSE CARD

On your response card, you can choose to leave a space for you to write in how many guests are invited from the family. If your envelopes only say the adult names (ie- Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Smith), then you can add this to your response card:We have reserved ___ seats in your honorThen you fill in the blank with a “2”, so they know that only two are invited. Some people are apprehensive about this method in case the invitee wants to bring their child instead of one of the adults, but personally I’ve never heard of this happening. Again, if you’re worried, stick to tradition and give them a personal phone call.There are other options such as writing “adult-only ceremony and reception” on the enclosure card or “adult-only reception to follow” as the reception line on the invitation. I always advise to stick to tradition when possible, but do what you feel most comfortable with. 

Check out our blog for more wedding resources!

Wedding Invitation Mailing Secrets

A wedding invitation is one of the most important things you'll ever mail to someone. Not to mention the most beautiful! Don't you want to make sure your invitations get to those mailboxes safely and timely?

Click below to download your FREE guide with all the tips and tricks to mailing your wedding invitations. It includes SO much valuable information, such as a wedding stationery timeline, insider postage tricks, envelope information, and mailing tips at the post office. Trust us, you don't want to skip this information. Your wedding invitations depend on it!

Quick Guide to Wedding Ceremony Program Wording

Wedding ceremony programs, simple as they may seem, are a very important part of the wedding day. Ceremony programs inform your guests not only of the order or the ceremony, but also other important details, such as the wedding party, honoring loved ones, and thanking you guests for being there. Here is the traditional outline of a wedding program, along with pointers on how you can customize the wording to fit you and your fiance's own personal style. And click here for a free download of programs from real weddings with sizes.

1. INTRODUCTION 

Let's start with the basics! The introduction will be the most straightforward part of your wedding program and should include the following information in order: the Bride's first and last name, the Groom's first and last name, month/day/year of the wedding, start time and the ceremony venue. This is basically a snippet of the information on your invitations.

2. ORDER OF CEREMONY 

This will likely be the most detailed portion of your wedding program, and will vary based on ceremony. For example, catholic weddings usually have a longer ceremony than a more contemporary ceremony. But regardless of religion, the order of ceremony usually outlines the processional, ceremony, and recessional for your guests. Again, there are many variations to this, but formally it looks something similar to the below. Your planner or officiant will know with the order of your ceremony.

• Prelude: the music playing while guests are seated. Make sure to include the song title, composer, and musician playing the piece (if applicable)

• Processional: the music playing while the grandparents, parents, groom, and wedding party proceed down the aisle

• Bridal Processional: the music playing while the bride makes her grand entrance and proceeds down the aisle

• Opening Greeting or Prayer by the officiant

• Readings: if you choose to have readings during your ceremony, you will outline which passages will be read and who will be reading them (typically a family member or close friend)

• Wedding Message: the officiant will often give a message honoring the couple

• Exchange of the Vows: the exchanging of the vows and rings

• Presentation: you and your fiance kiss, the officiant announces the couple as husband and wife, and the crowd cheers!

• Recessional: the song playing as the newlyweds and bridal party walk back down the aisle

Feeling a little overwhelmed? No worries. Your planner or officiant will know with the order of your ceremony. Or you can choose to keep it super simple, similar to this:

• Prelude

• Seating and Processional

• We get married!

• Recessional

3. WEDDING PARTY   

In this section, you will want to outline all the family and friends who participated in the ceremony, almost like a casting list of a broadway play!  This should include:

• Full title and name of your officiant

• Parents of the bride

• Parents of the groom

• Grandparents of the bride

• Grandparents of the groom

• Maid/Matron of honor (you also have the option of including relation to bride- sister, cousin, or friend)

• Bridesmaids (list in alphabetical order or standing order)

• Best Man(same rules apply as maid of honor)

• Groomsmen(list in alphabetical order or standing order)

• Flower girls/Ring bearers

• House Party

• Ushers

You also have the option of adding the organist or ceremony musicians. And when in doubt, it is best to air on the side of formality when listing the names in your wedding program.

4. FINAL MESSAGES 

Here is where most couples will choose to include a thank you message to share their appreciation of attending the wedding. Example: Thank you so much for the love each and every one of you has shown us throughout our relationship. We are so grateful to have you in our lives and honored you have traveled near and far to be with us on this special day. We couldn't imagine our wedding without you! Final messages can also honor family members who have passed in loving memory. Example: On this special day, we honor those who are not with us today, but are forever in our hearts. or We remember those who cannot be with us today, but are present in spirit. 

5. MORE OPTIONS

All programs are unique to every wedding. You can add fun facts about you and your fiancé, fun facts about your venue, your wedding hashtag, your new address as married couple, or information about your reception following the ceremony. More program ideas can be found on our Pinterest page specifically for programs we've pinned to inspire and give you even more ideas! 

We hope this helps you put together the perfect wedding program content!

Five RSVP Secrets You Need to Know

The best way to keep track of your wedding RSVP’s is to stay organized and efficient. In this post, we give your our top five tips for tracking RSVP’s to help save your time and effort for the fun parts of wedding planning!

It is always said that planning a wedding is stressful. The truth? 99% of wedding planning is fun and exciting! The stressful 1% includes keeping track of your RSVPs. Unfortunately, as much as we may love them, wedding guests are not always the best when it comes to responding to your invitation. We are sharing our tips and tricks to tracking down those RSVPs so your wedding planning process is 100% stress-free!

Years of experience in the stationery biz has taught us the RSVP secrets that you need to be using throughout your wedding planning process to ensure organization and accuracy with your RSVP guest count!

1. Use Your ABC's and Your 123's

   When you are finished creating your guest list, number each guest row in Excel. Then write that number in pencil on the back corner of each RSVP card. This will help you keep track of RSVP cards that come back with no name on them! And yes this tends to happen a lot (sigh). This way, if a card is returned to you with no name, simply look at the number written on the back and cross check it with your guest list. You can even use a black light pen in lieu of a pencil!

   Hint: When numbering your Excel guest list, do not use the row number. Instead create a whole new column with new numbers so if you add any rows, your numbering stays the same.

2. Organization is Excel(lent)

   Before you even think about sending out invitations, you should have an excel sheet of your guest list. When the RSVPs do start coming in, you will have a central document where you can keep track of all the RSVPs you have received. This will also help with keeping track of who still needs to respond.

3. Going Digital

   Adding an RSVP link on your website will give your guests another way to respond and make it even easier for them to RSVP! Most wedding websites have a built in RSVP option that is easy to add, so don't feel like you have to be a computer whiz to figure this one out. We recommend theknot.com and minted.com for building a wedding website with RSVP options.

4. Trouble with Too Much Time

   When setting your RSVP cutoff date (the date by which guests should respond), do not set the date for too long after the invitation was sent. It is good to put a little bit of pressure on your guests to get their responses in on time. Giving guests any more than 6 weeks to respond will likely cause them to put it off and eventually forget to respond. The ideal response time is 3-4 weeks before your wedding.

5. When It Pays to Procrastinate

   The unfortunate reality of wedding planning is that not all guests respond to your invitations before the RSVP date, which can create frustration when trying to tally up final guest counts, making a seating chart, telling your caterer guest count, etc. We recommend starting your seating chart two-three weeks before since, unfortunately, not all your responses will be in at the one-month mark. Creating your seating chart at two-three weeks will allow a little cushion for those last few responses to come in, and will allow you a two week cushion to track down those last pesky RSVPs.

We hope this helps you stay organized with your RSVP’s and enjoy wedding planning!